Stress!

I feel very overwhelmed with school work and need to clear my head before I delve into research, outlining, etc.

To be honest, I am extremely good at getting school work done. Procrastination has never been an issue for me (at least not since college because I'm actually interested in what I study)... and I am constantly finishing things long before they are due. Yes, this sounds like a great work ethic but it also has its downfalls. Unlike most people who stress out about everything last minute... I stress out about getting everything done early. I really can't enjoy anything if I have looming obligations over my head so I isolate myself until I feel satisfied with the work I've accomplished. Normally, when I only have two or three small things to do, I don't get very stressed out. I set aside a specific time each day to finish at least one assignment and then reward myself with... I don't know, a television show. Haha. But when the assignments are larger, it's not as easy to stay relaxed.

I have already written one of my 15-page final papers which isn't due until the 15th of December. Although I still have to edit it and add a few things, I'm pretty much finished with it. I then have two other 10-15 page papers to write which I really haven't started at all. So, at the moment, those two looming papers are definitely stressing me out. One is due on the 5th of December and the other isn't due until January 14th but I'm planning to finish it by December 7th. Which means, I have Thursday through Sunday of this week to write one paper and then Thursday through Sunday of the following week to write the other one. I haven't yet been to the public library here which I hear is beautiful, so I think I'm just going to spend lots and lots of time there over the next couple weeks.

It's strange because I'm stressed out but I don't really know what I'm stressed out about. I know that I'll get them done, but I suppose I'm worried they won't be as fun or as easy to write as I'm hoping they'll be. Easy meaning that I won't be annoyed writing them. I always really try to pick topics that I'm really interested in because the worst thing is having to write 15 pages about something you don't care about. It took me only two days to write the paper I completed already and I think that's because it was something I was really interested in. It compares the Netherlands and the United States, focusing on whether or not the Christian population in each country can be said to have an affect on the legality concerning abortion, euthanasia and same-sex marriage in both places.

The two papers I have yet to write about are 1. Comparing the gay rights movements in both the Netherlands and the United States following WWII and 2. Homosexuality in Japan. This last topic is a bit strange for me as I have never been all that interested in learning about homosexuality in Asia but I think it will be fun to branch out. I'm hoping to learn something interesting about the strong family values present in Japan and how that could affect views on homosexuality and perhaps also something about Buddhism and it's effect. I'm slightly worried about the Japan paper because I know literally nothing about Japan and fear I might get overwhelmed. Plus, I always write way too much. I never really realize how short 10-15 pages actually is and suddenly I have way to much information to fit into that amount of space. I find it extraordinarily difficult to condense information. I never know what to leave in and what to take out.

Anyway, tonight I am going to try and finish an optional outline for my Japan paper and send it to my teacher. If I don't finish it tonight, I'll have to finish it tomorrow because I want to get started on my other paper on Thursday. Plus, tomorrow I will have barely any time to do anything because I have class all day then have to cook some food for my program's Thanksgiving dinner. I opted only to cook two vegetable dishes because I knew they wouldn't take very long.

Oh and tomorrow is Christian's birthday which I am very sad to be missing... for the second time in a row. It sucks. But I sent him a birthday package which I hope he gets soon/enjoys.